Do you have patterns in your life that keep repeating themselves? We all do! Does it feel like you have a life experience degree?

Are they patterns that have held you back? Do you have that sense of dj vu when you start to recognise something is about to happen all over again? It may be in relationships, work, family, whatever, but the one common factor in it all is you.

Does your self esteem start to suffer? Do you ask yourself, where am I going wrong? Why do these things always happen to me? Believe me, Ive been there.

Heres the thing though, maturity is life experience. Like Thomas Edison in developing the electric light. He tried it hundreds of ways before he discovered a way for it to work. Now that youve had these patterns occur som many times, youve certainly learnt what doesnt work.

The definition of stupidity is doing the same thing in the same way and expecting a different result. Do you really want to go around that mountain again? No Way! Then learn from your own life experience. Take redical responsibility for your life. Understand what went wrong and where it started to unravel. Focus on what you do want, rather than what you dont.

Do things differently, even act differently. Educate yourself on how to do things differently. The great mentor Jim Rohn says Use the past as a book to learn from, not as a bat to beat yourself up with. Have grace for yourself and your past, but resolve to do it differently from now on.

Pain can be a great motivator. Several years ago, I had a boyfriend for 2 years. He married someone else whilst still seeing me. Eighteen months later, a different boyfriend did almost the same thing (at least this one broke up with me first, but married someone else a short couple of months later).

I have to tell you, this was an absolutely devastating time in my life. I questioned EVERYTHING about myself. What was so wrong with me? What had I done so horribly wrong?

I have since learned from my past experience, and I choose my friends more carefully now. Im basically a nice person, and I dont enjoy conflict. But guess what! I stand up for myself now, and I have better boundaries. Ive matured. Why? Ive learned from my life experience. Not to be cynical, but to make better choices.

What about you? What patterns have been repeating in your life? Do you really want to go around that mountain again? What radical personal responsibility or choices can you make today to change that pattern or direction in your life. I cant do it for you. But I have faith you can! yours positively

Danick Buskermolen