Marriage & Relationships. Ephesians 5:20-5:33 Ephesians 5:20-33 , Conversation. We found out in part 1, that there are three Cs in marriage. The first was commitment, now we will look at conversation. Many marriages fail due to the lack of conversation between the man and woman. A conversation is, to speek, communicate, to talk. Exchanging information in the form of our likes ,dislikes, emotions, feelings and thoughts. How much do you really know about each other? The Bible states that we should be slow to speek and quick to listen. The ability to listen to one another is vital to a healthy marriage. Not only between the husband and wife but also between the parents and children. Ive talked to a number of parents that say that their biggest problem is the way a spouse treats their children. We will cover children, in the last of the series. What a conversation is not, is, barking out orders like a drill Sargent, I talk and you listen. Wives ,have you ever heard this at home?,.. Your husband comes home from work and says, "Hi Honey, whats for dinner?" He sets down and eats and tells you its good, gets up from the table, grabs the paper and turns on the news, and for the next 4 hours nothing much is said because a great movie or ball game is on.? And husbands, how about you, have you ever come home and been told, "Hi dear, suppers on the stove." As she sits and talks to her sisters or mom on the phone, hour after hour? With just these two things, there starts a breakdown in communication between the two and the marriage suffers. Both parties have feelings and needs and wants, that must be expressed and without that expression a rift starts that may cause one or both parties to start to look at alternatives in being able to express themselves to someone else. Ive known people that sit and wait for the opportunity to step in on a marriage, that isn't quite going right, to be able to take advantage of a lonely woman or man. They tell them, " I know that they just don't understand you, sit down with me and tell me all about it." Do you know someone like this? Its the type of person that is willing to listen and console and take advantage. I heard a minister once tell a story of a husband and wife that were mad at each other and really didn't know why, so the wife wrote a note and placed it in a spot that she knew that her husband would see it. She hung it on the refrigerator, it read, "Bob. I hate you. Love Jill." We need to take time and just sit down and talk. Turning off the television, putting down the paper, hanging up the phone and sometimes, with children, hire a baby sitter and go out, away from the house ,just the two of you, maby you could even call it a date, and talk. Talk about each other, how you really feel, and I know you men, your macho and nothing bothers you, but thats what you've been taught all these years, let go and tell her everything, when Ive been hurt at work or passed over for a promotion or something was said that really bothered me, I told my wife and she understood and could relate to me and help me to deal with the situation from a different point of view. Women, I know that your just waiting for your husband to say lets talk to each other, it will be easier for you than for him ,so be patient. The Bible states, Be ye angry and sin not,. let not the sun go down on your wrath. Many preachers that Ive known have stated that it is a sin to be angry, and that is not true. Jesus was angry many times in scripture, the key is that he didn't sin. And so with us. We can be angry but we have to know the limit of it, knowing where to stop and being able and willing to say were sorry. Never, and I say again, Never, go to bed angry with each other, it will fester into a larger problem, and if Jesus would happen to come back at that time, you'd both be in trouble. Stop, talk and work it out. Thats why its so important to set up a dialog with each other day after day, take time to know each other and start trusting each other. That no matter what the problem is, the other will understand. And if nothing is wrong, still talk, it opens up an avenue of dependence, trust and respect for the marriage. Respect each other in your conversations, never put the other down for trying to express themselves. For its not the number of words that matter, but the quality of words that each of you use. Never talk down to you mate, never talk at your mate and never bring up each others past, some things are better off forgotten, but always talk to your mate. This is the second part of sermon ,on , marriage and a way to strengthen it. In part three we will discuss the last C in marriage, and that is Christ. We will also hit on the subject of children's place in the home. |
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